To the one you want to become

I received many requests to speak or write about the topic of self-confidence and which way to take to be the person you want to be. The truth is that there is no ONE Way. You’ll have to figure out your own way. Still, here are some points I share with all the great people I’m honored to mentor (though some may not know about it-that I decided to be their mentor):

1. KICK YOURSELF’S A**

You’ve heard this before, but I mean it. You need to challenge yourself every day. Get up, get your tasks done…AND that’s not it. Do some additional tasks. This requires your effort. Do some research in your area of your interest. Check what’s going on in your town, who’s speaking about what. Make it a rule, to attend at least a few times a month some interesting events, lectures, concerts, theatre (I’d prefer once a week,..but let’s start small).

2. BE PRESENT & LET OTHERS KNOW ABOUT IT

You don’t have to change the world by inventing it. Just be there where change is happening. Show your presence. That’s already outstanding if you consider the fact that most people are…well, not present. Make some effort to share the things you see, learn with others. Even when you’re not a social media person, you need to learn to push that button “post”. Push that button. Let people see where you are, what you’re doing. Chances are high that you motivate them to do the same. In the long run, they’ll join you.

3. DEVELOP YOUR OWN PROJECT & LIVE IT

Do you see all these people making news with their great projects. And you wonder: How did they do it? How do they find the time? It’s not that difficult as it looks like. And it doesn’t take as much times as you think. The secret is this: Love what you do! Again, your effort is needed here. Create an idea. What do you like? What are you passionate about and would like others to share? What are the skills, the gift you can pass on? Develop a project idea. Make it your priority to work on this project, day by day, week by week…One day you’ll start living it. Before you know it, it takes you a minimum effort to do anything related to it. Because it feels natural. And once you become natural about the things you do, that’s when you win people for your project. That’s the thing you need to know: Nobody wants to be forced into buying something. Sales people have great strategies to make you buy something while feeling that it was your choice. Alright, that’s not your approach. However, the thinking is the same: People need to choose to join you. They’ll do so only if they can identify with what you do….OR You! Therefore, go to point 2 above: Be present, let people know what you’re about. Please, focus on the positives only. Nobody in public needs to know what doesn’t work in your private life. For this, you have friends whom you can call.

4. FIND A PARTNER IN CRIME

You need at least one person who can review your work with you. I have such a person, depending on the project or plan I have. And I’m also that person for others. These are people who just need to listen to your progress, your challenges, your growth-related insecurities (it’s normal to have them). And most importantly, these are the persons who cheer you up when you’re about to make something happen. Be aware: They’ll not be identical to your close friends. Friends are your friends in the first place, and not your trouble-shooters. Some may not even understand your drive to be a better person of yourself. But truth be told, if your partner in crime turns out to be your best friend – that’s perfect!

5. CELEBRATE YOUR ACHIEVEMENTS

Remember, remember, remember to celebrate your steps. Remember that you got here because of the very one moment when you decided “I want to be the best I can be”. So, you need to reward yourself because it’s not for granted that you get up while your body feels like sleeping. After each achievement, have some rest, treat yourself, have quality time with family and friends. And remember to share with us when there’s something to celebrate. We people love to join parties.

For more, contact me: contact@kaneza.org